Friday, December 16, 2005

Last night's dream....


I had a dream last night. It was a bad one. I dreamed that all 4 dogs somehow got out of the house, and got lost. I’m not sure how this happened, but I do know that when we discovered it, they had been gone for some time.

The panic, fear and despair were strong. Even though I’m now awake, I can still feel the remnants of the anguish I felt in the dream. I do recall that it was dark when the dogs were lost. Then, as with all dreams, things become murky… and there was no real sense of time. The next thing I remember is that it was daytime. The sun was shining, but my heart was still heavy. I think we had been out looking and looking for them, but had had no luck. Suddenly, my instincts told me to go to the door and call out to them.

I was then standing on the porch. And that’s when I saw them- Kira and Yelda, followed by Ben and Cora. Kira came running into my arms kissing my face. I cried and cried with relief and joy. And then I realized there was a fifth dog. It was Sailor. He stood back from the rest of us, quietly wagging his tail, panting a wee bit. He looked happy, healthy and strong.
My heart filled with joy as I gazed at him…
And then, my dream floated away.

When I woke up, I remembered everything very clearly. As I moved around my room, getting dressed to take the dogs out, it came to me in a brilliant dazzling flash! Sailor had brought the dogs’ home to us. He came from the other side of the bridge to help them find their way safely home.
And that is why he didn’t come closer. He couldn’t. He was as close as he could be.
And then I began to weep. Tears of immense longing and sorrow and tears of joy mixed together. I wanted to be able to hold his head in my hands, to look into those eyes…. to kiss that spotty nose and to tell him that I love him. He hadn’t come to me before… in sleep or in consciousness. I had been waiting… yearning for him to come to us once again. Stories from others, sharing that they had been visited by a beloved pet now at the bridge made me wonder why Sailor hadn’t come.
And, I worried about it.

I can put that worry away because Sailor has finally come to us. He brought my babies home to me. He took care of them, and us, as he always did. He’s still there, watching over us. He’s still close.
He still loves us, as we love him.

I had a dream last night. It was a bad one. Yet it ended a happy one.
Merry Christmas sweet Sailor-man. We love you!

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